A 5 leaf clover

I wanted just a token
to remember what i love
the children that had blessed me
who went to other homes
i wanted something special
that i could call my own
to remind me of the good times
when i'm far from home

A 5 leaf clover
lies close to my heart
the one i love found it
and gave it to me from the start
those times that are no more
now rest upon my heart
a simple 5 leaf clover
to know that love was what we are

She was tiny when she was born
and weak in her own way
but i sang her to sleep softly
i held her close to me
I've lost her twice in this lifetime
but God knows my heart
now she's forever with me
although we're far apart

That simple 5 leaf clover
that hardly anyone has found
was a gift from one person
who i love and hate can never abound
this simple 5 leaf clover
that lies upon my heart
keeps me believing that
in time i can start...

I can start being me
and loving the life i live
i can hope that tomorrow is better
that the yesterdays nightmares that play
of all the things i did
that were completely wrong
He knows my heart is always his
and that 5 leaf clover makes me strong

He doesn't know the effect
that he has upon my heart
that the times that seem so far away
i relive them every night
The love i feel inside of me
is never gonna change
the rarity of something so special
my life will never me the same...


A 5 leaf clover
lies close to my heart
the one i love found it
and gave it to me from the start
those times that are no more
now rest upon my heart
a simple 5 leaf clover
to know that love was what we are

dont come around anymore

I feel like the floor has fallen out from under me
i feel like my heart is shattered like glass
i cant imagine this craziness around me
I can't believe the thought that
relationships dont last
i really truly care for you
but the time has come and gone
a short relationship we had
but now it's all done
I do want to thank you
for the laughs and all the smiles
i want to thank you for the times
that you held me when i cried
I just can't live
a lie anymore
I'm in love with another
and you don't come around anymore

Christmas Prayer

My Christmas Prayer is simple
on this rainy Christmas eve
I pray that everyone
be around people that make you happy
I hope that deep in your hearts
theres a hope that still can grow
that the inner child among us
will have that Christmas glow.
I pray for the broken hearted
the tired and the meek
I hope that can somehow
within themselves find peace
I pray for my fellow soldiers
who are defending what we love
May your days be filled with merriment
with joy and lots of love.
And as for those closest to me
to you i pray this pray
may we continue to love each other
may we always for each other be there
Whether its raining snowing or sunny
Lets enjoy this blessed day
That we always remember
the specialness of this day
May we all find that inner love
deep inside our hearts
to forgive those that have hurt us
forgive those who tore us apart
That we can all pray for one another
and still remain friends and family
even though we may not all be blood
I send my love to you all

on this special Christmas day.

The Wedding dress

I looked at my wedding dress
it brought back memories.
ones that i had forgotten
ones that made my happy
I forgot the antique beading
and the lacy sleeves
i forgot about the blue cake icing
that he wiped on my sleeve
I remember picking it out
just my sister and me
I thought itd take forever
to find the one that fit perfectly
I was nervous and anxious
so proud to be engaged
i never thought in a thousand years
that i'd be marrying a country man
We picked a few dresses
but this one caught my eye
the ivory colored material
the beading and the size
I was so excited
when i got to take it home
the dress fit so perfectly
I would be the bride
no one would know
The day i walked down the isle
to see my husband to be
I was surprised he had a tie on at all
or matching shoes on his feet
The moment he put that ring on my finger
the whole world seemed to change
The day i became a Mrs.
I wanted things to never change
It's funny when a memory
reminds you of all that was.
I have to let go of this old Wedding dress
But I can't just yet.
Deep inside of me
i know that things are done
but this was the one piece of me
that doesn't have me undone
so for today i have this wedding dress
with the antique beading and lace
It sits in my closet as a reminder
That one decision can change your fate.

Old Blue

She aint pretty
Shes fallin apart
She sometimes smokes
but shes part of my heart
Shes a beast on wheels
with a cadillac smooth ride
she often smells
but shes mine all mine

NO matter how much
you think shes a death trap
no matter how much rust she has
she's my perfect little care
that gets thru anything
shes my favorite car
My Lebaron Old Blue

She sometimes breaks down
in the most inconvenient places
She can take a beating
She has trouble braking
She likes long trips
through the woods of WV
She may look like crap
But shes mine all mine


NO matter how much
you think shes a death trap
no matter how much rust she has
she's my perfect little care
that gets thru anything
shes my favorite car
My Lebaron Old Blue

Over the Bull!

This song has been playing in my head all day. I spent most of last night at work crying my eyes out because i didn't know what else to do. I am so sick and tired of people telling me how awful of a wife/person/friend I have/had been. I'm tired of people trying to bring me down by talking trash about me. Why should i care. In the bible is says that we are to abstain from the appearance of evil. How can i when everywhere i turn theres something else against me. I don't care anymore. I don't care. I am tired of woman being jealous over nothing. My business if any is with my ex husband not with you. You have nothing to worry about get over it! next i'm tired of people telling how i should live my life and who i need to have in my life. I'm grown. I know what is good for me and what isn't good for me. Finally...If i'm trusting you with what i'm feeling don't tell me that i'm stupid for who i love. because the reasons that i love them are different than the reasons that you know about that make you hate them. I am a very compassionate person. Im a very caring and kind person. But i'm at my wits end. I can't take it anymore. I have people gossiping behind my back because i'm talking crap about my ex. Than i have people telling me to my face that who i love is no good for me. Then i have the other side who is stalking me saying that i'm nothing but a Lyin' B*T**! I've had enough. This is my life to live. Not yours. Who I love. Who i sleep with. Where I go is all up to me. The minute that you realize that i don't give to craps about you is a good day for everyone. So if you have something that you'd like to say to me. MAN UP and SAY IT TO MY FACE!

That is all!

Simply me

NOTE: This is NOT WRITTEN TO OFFEND ANYONE! YOU TAKE IT HOW YOU WANT TO. IT WAS JUST WRITTEN FROM A LOT OF WHATS GOING ON IN MY HEAD. THIS IS NOT ABOUT ANYONE IN PARTICULAR!

To you i may not be the most beautiful

or have the perfect hair

i may look a mess often

I may act dumb and make people stare

but who do you think you are

telling me who i need to be

why should i start living

because you think my silence means peace

I've had a broken heart

i've been down in the dumps

i've drank to much at one time

i'm hung out with lots of chumps

don't tell me what i need to do

and who i need to be

because at the end of the day

you aren't here

my worry's are to between God and me

please don't think i'm shattered

because i don't follow what you think i should do

don't tell me that i'm running

when you haven't walked in my shoes

My life isn't under a microscope 

for you to pick apart

you said that you don't need me

that i wasn't welcome in your heart.
Well let me make this very clear

to those that think your god

I'm just the same plain boring girl I was

from the very start

i'm crazy cool and funny

obnoxious to the core

i don't have a problem 

with showing you the door

don't think for one second that i won't stand my ground

So get over yourself.

stop worrying bout what i'm doing

I just simply wish you well.