It's so hard to think about life when you get caught in a moment with someone. Having the will power to say no. And for the first time in my life truly listening to God about the situation. No I'm not saying it was easy...but being on the brink to give away something so important to who you are makes the decision even more memorable. There was a time in my life that i would have said yes to just about anyone. Because i was yearning and wanting to feel something. I was so numb to the world that the physicality of someone close was all i could feel. In my numbness i found someone who wanted to repair or help repair my brokenness. And in return i eventually made some bad calls and went back to doing what i knew best and running away. It's so strange for me to read the Bible and see all these people unafraid to stand for what they believe in...and i couldn't stand in my marriage. Maybe it makes me sound old fashioned but unless God provides me with a man who is a Godly man and who he tells me I'm suppose to be with...there are no men for me right now worth a one night stand to get a temporary satisfaction that will disappear in the morning. And no man should want that with me. I'm a daughter of a King and i deserve a Prince
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