Relapse

Waking up each morning
washing the filth off from the night before
makes me come to realize
i don't want to live this life anymore
the more i push to be better
the farther from God i get
the more i strive for perfection
The deeper i dig my ditch

I'm relapsing once again
going back to how
i'd always been
i don't remember who
i woke up next to
All i know is it wasn't you
with each breath i take
i hate to say
this relapse
may be my end

I wonder what God thinks of me
if he wants to come around
I know that he never leaves me
I know the victory's been won
but how can he love me
the sinner that i am
To want to help me
out of my ditch
to bring me back to him


I'm relapsing once again
going back to how
i'd always been
i don't remember who
i woke up next to
All i know is it wasn't you
with each breath i take
i hate to say
this relapse
may be my end

how much do i need to drink
How many people can fill this void
how many times to i have to say praise the Lord
when my lifestyle smacks him in the face?
at what point do i need to open up my eyes?
do i trust God enough to love me now
even though i'm the thorn in his side?


I'm relapsing once again
going back to how
i'd always been
i don't remember who
i woke up next to
All i know is it wasn't you
with each breath i take
i hate to say
this relapse
may be my end

I don't want to relapse anymore....